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Rated 2.99 stars
by 247 people

ReelTalk Movie Reviews
Sorority Slasher
by Betty Jo Tucker

The Row follows the misadventures of a college Freshman who wants to join a sorority. Personally, I think that’s where she went wrong. My experience with sororities could be presented as evidence here. However, that’s another story entirely, dear reader. This slasher movie is about groups of scantily-clad teen-age girls crazy partying -- and a maniacal villain who gets his jollies by making his own life-size dolls.  

But Riley (Lala Kent), the coed in question, couldn’t possibly know what she was in for as her father, Detective Cole (Randy Couture), drops her off for her first day on campus.

What a great idea for a daughter/dad detective thriller – kind of a Veronica Mars set-up! Unfortunately, The Row goes down another path.   

Serial killer is lurking.

Solving the case? No -- not working,

until a dad and daughter face

the horrible things taking place.


Coeds -- the targets of this guy

who tries to stab them so they’ll die.

Phi Lamda secrets hold the clue.

Why take it out on pledges new?


“The Row” would like to draw us in.

Too bad it’s clear who did the sin.

And loud music plus background sounds

distract us; they are out of bounds.


For actors, no complaints to make.

Yet frenzied opening seems fake.

Bloody scenes ooze a lot of gore.

Though horror fans will ask for more.

The Row does a good job revealing the killer’s severe trauma leading to his mental disorder as well as the way he stalks his victims. And, the scene where “final girl” Riley gets left alone to fight with the slasher at the end comes across as quite suspenseful. Also, Detective Cole’s secret about Riley’s mom is a nice touch here. But the slashing scenes leave much to be desired. They are too blurry, fast and furious.   

WARNING: Overuse of shaky camera filming can be hard to take sometimes, and The Row is full of that technique. If you are prone to migraines, this alert is especially for you.

The slasher film is such a neat, self-contained genre. --- Stephen Graham Jones

I don’t mind blood and gore. But I mind when it’s a slasher film, and it’s some guy looking for a woman. --- Cassandra Peterson

(Released by Lionsgate/Grindstone and rated “R” for bloody violence, language, drug and alcohol abuse and some sexual content.)

For more information, go to the IMDb or Rotten Tomatoes website.

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