2007 has not been kind to werewolves. After the laughably bad, soap opera-quality Blood & Chocolate, these creatures of the night undergo even further embarrassment in a little cheesefest called Skinwalkers. This movie, a shoddy mishmash of genre elements, is about as ridiculous as horror can get without being intentional. Although I've defended horror movies on many occasions, Z-grade films like Skinwalkers make the argument a difficult one to win.

A kind of one-monster version of Underworld, Skinwalkers drops viewers right into the middle of a battle being fought between warring factions of werewolves. On one side stand those like Varek (Jason Behr) who have long since given into their monstrous urges and relish transforming into the beast within. Others, such as Jonas (Elias Koteas), are searching for a cure to their curse and lock themselves up to avoid going on a bloodthirsty rampage. But the future of all lycanthropes is at stake, for an ancient prophecy tells of a child whose 13th birthday will endow him with the power to affect each and every one of them.

Not wanting to give up their powers or let their savage inner selves fade away, Varek and his cronies roll into town with the intention of killing the boy in question (Matthew Knight), while his mother (Rhona Mitra), Jonas, and a select few go on the run, hoping to survive long enough to see the prophecy fulfilled and become human again.

A debate has raged on and will continue to be bandied about for years to come about whether or not a horror film can be successful with a meager PG-13 rating. For me, it's always been a question of content and context. For example, 1408 was a chilling little ghost story that didn't need to shed blood to be creepy, whereas Stay Alive felt like a hardcore, R-rated picture with all the red stuff gutted out for the sake of a less harsh rating enabling more kiddies to buy tickets. Skinwalkers is a full-fledged member of the latter tribe, a movie whose tendency to shy away from blood and gore is just one of the factors making it such a  chuckle-inducing dud. The trouble begins during the beginning credits -- or, should I say, partial credits, because after announcing the title, the movie randomly throws up the names of the writers before abruptly beginning, then not mentioning another soul until the end. It's as if the cast and crew decided to blame the script right off the bat for the mess viewers are about to see. 

Almost everything in Skinwalkers suffers from its  head-smackingly bad script. The performances are hilariously awful, especially from Behr (whose character bears a secret that makes only the tiniest impact on the story), and those playing Varek's nefarious crew, all of whom board the first train to Chuckletown by walking around with their mouths agape and fangs jutting out for half the movie. The make-up effects come across as just a couple of steps above leftover werewolf masks from a dollar store. The confusing plot never decides whether the "skinwalkers" change during the full moon or every night. Even the action sequences gave me the giggles, from a small town shootout where everyone and their mother whips out some heavy artillery at some point to a climactic showdown between Jonas and Vareks' transformed selves (think "WWE match with extra hair").

Thankfully, Skinwalkers is mercifully short (running at a smidge over 80 minutes), and it includes a few lovely ladies. Still, the movie remains bad enough for you and your friends to have a ball poking fun at it. But, because so few excellent horror flicks make it to the multiplexes lately, I can't help wondering if word processors will soon begin revolting against being used to write dreck like this on a regular basis.

MY RATING: * 1/2 (out of ****)

(Released by Lionsgate and rated "PG-13" for intense sequences of violence and action, some sexual material and language.)