After seeing Roberto Benigni’s Pinocchio, my imagination got the best of me. I couldn’t stop wondering what Pinocchio himself might think about this latest film version of his magical life. Fortunately, I caught up with the famous former puppet during a late-night visit to the Twilight Zone, so I asked him. Here are the highlights of our conversation.

TUCKER: Thank you, Mr. Pinocchio, for your willingness to be interviewed tonight. It’s very courageous of you, especially in light of the bad press garnered by the latest film about you.

PINOCCHIO: Actually, I’m eager to set the record straight concerning all this. To say I’m disappointed is an understatement. Why didn’t Mr. Roberto Benigni follow my advice? I wanted someone younger to star in the title role, not the filmmaker himself.

TUCKER: I sympathize with your concern. A man almost 50 years old portraying a puppet who wants to be a real boy does seem a bit ridiculous – unless it’s on the stage, of course. I remember Mary Martin played Peter Pan successfully in live theater productions, even though she was well past her prime.

PINOCCHIO: That’s true. But you can’t get away with something like this on big screens today, and Mr. Benigni should have known better. I’m also upset about the film’s dreadful dubbing for English-language audiences.

TUCKER: I’m glad you mentioned that. To me, Breckin Meyer’s youthful voice coming out of Roberto Benigni’s mouth seemed too surreal and off-putting. What was Benigni thinking?

PINOCCHIO: I suppose he had in mind the 1996 film, The Adventures of Pinocchio. Young Jonathan Taylor Thomas provided my puppet voice in that one. But the wooden puppet really looked like a boy. Then, when my character came to life, I was played by Thomas himself. No complaints from me there.

TUCKER: That worked for me, too. And I thought Martin Landau gave one of his best performances as Gepetto. However, Walt Disney’s 1940 animated classic remains my favorite film about you. Which reminds me, with all the recent technical advances in animation, you’d think Benigni would take advantage of them in a 2002 fantasy movie.

PINOCCHIO: I sometimes think Mr. Benigni is an animated creature himself. Remember his exuberant Oscar-acceptance for Life Is Beautiful?

TUCKER: Who can forget it? But I predict we won't see Benigni at this year’s Academy Awards ceremony. Still, his Pinocchio does feature some lovely costumes, particularly for the "Blue Fairy" – and it’s not one of the worst movies ever made.

PINOCCHIO: Be careful. Your nose is starting to grow longer.

(Released by Miramax and rated "G" for general audiences. On 2-discs, the Buena Vista Home Entertainment DVD of Pinocchio includes: both the English language version of the film and the original Italian language version; the "Windows of Pinocchio" Fao Schwarz holiday windows in New York City; a "Voices of Pinocchio" segment about creating the English dubbed version.)