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ReelTalk Movie Reviews
Screaming from the Stars
by Adam Hakari

Werewolves. Ghosts. Naked vampires. From its inception, horror distributor Scream Factory has prided itself on the variety of titles and monsters it's resurrected for genre fans everywhere. One month can roll out the royal treatment for a '60s classic with your favorite stars, while the next can bring you an '80s slasher obscurity you never knew existed. Scream Factory's reach knows no bounds and extends even to the heavens, which is where it's found two new Blu-ray releases for the winter season: the gritty space chiller Saturn 3 and the serio-comic Night of the Comet.

SATURN 3 (1980)

On a remote base orbiting Saturn, scientists Adam (Kirk Douglas) and Alex (Farrah Fawcett) work in peace. Resistant to the ways that inspired most of humanity's exodus from Earth, the pair's serenity is soon disrupted by the arrival of a visitor and his fateful cargo. Captain Benson (Harvey Keitel) swings by the base with "Hector," a huge, sophisticated robot meant to render one of the scientists obsolete. But unbeknownst to Alex and Adam, their trouble has doubled, for not only is Benson a psychopath who killed the officer whose place he assumed, Hector has picked up on his murderous ways and sets about enacting his own rampage.

Saturn 3 is a silly sci-fi movie made by and populated with the very sort of people you (mostly) wouldn't associate with a silly sci-fi movie. Under the direction of Singin' in the Rain's Stanley Donen, Douglas and Fawcett cavort under the covers (both receiving equal screen time spent nude), while Keitel scowls from the sidelines with his voice notoriously dubbed over by British actor Roy Dotrice. With a set-up like that, you might expect Saturn 3 to nab a special place in cinematic infamy, but while it was a fairly prominent bust in its time, it's too much of a bore to get riled up about. The flick has quite a bit going for it -- evocative production design, a neat-looking killer robot, a middle-aged Douglas who's totally game to play action hero -- although it soon jettisons whatever promise it possessed out into the cosmos. It never follows through on any of the ideas presented (like the rules of this future society that make it okay for Benson to demand Alex as a mate), and Donen can't settle on whether Hector is an emotionless automaton with a bloodlust or a victim in his own right. The film wants to have the sex, violence, and smarts of Demon Seed, but its incompetence gets in the way of stimulating the intellect and quickening the pulse.

Yeah, Saturn 3 is a dud, but it's the sort of bad movie you tend to forget about an hour after the credits roll. Though the visuals are pretty cool considering the miniscule budget with which they were put together, the movie as a whole lacks the consistent kookiness that's at the heart of the greatest cult classics. Saturn 3 is more disappointing than terrible, a flick that addressed every chance it had to make itself a mean little thriller with an apathetic shrug.

-Audio commentary featuring film expert/Saturn 3 superfan Greg Moss and moderator David Bradley.

-An interview with Dotrice, who expresses amazement that Keitel hasn't come to take revenge on being dubbed over.

-An interview with special effects guru Colin Chilvers.

-Ten minutes of deleted scenes added for the film's network television premiere.

-A deleted scene showing what happens after Fawcett and Douglas' characters indulge in some futuristic drugs.

-A theatrical trailer.

-TV spots.

-A still gallery.

-A DVD copy of the feature film.

NIGHT OF THE COMET (1984)
 
Had your fill of roided-up beefcakes taking on armageddon? If so, may I direct your attention to Night of the Comet, which posits what might transpire if two valley girls were in charge at the end of the world. Teenage sisters Regina (Catherine Mary Stewart) and Samantha (Kelli Maroney) wake up one morning to find themselves presumably the last people on earth, with a passing comet having turned most everyone else into literal dust the night before. Those left over have become flesh-hungry zombies, which put a real damper on the siblings' post-apocalyptic shopping spree. Help arrives in the form of truck driver Hector (Robert Beltran), but these kids will need more than an extra gun when a group of scientists target them for their own nefarious needs.

Abhorrent as the idea of a remake is to a lot of people, Night of the Comet has always ranked high on my list of flicks to do over, were I given the chance. Though seen as an '80s cult classic, the culture of the time isn't so vital a part of its charm that the whole experience would be ruined by updating the setting by a few decades. But more than that, Night of the Comet shoots for a horror/comedy blend that's not entirely successful at selling the viewer on either genre. There are a few funny lines here and there ("Daddy would've gotten us Uzis," Samantha whines as her gun jams), and the zombies look a little creepy, but the film's structure needs a whole mess of work done. There isn't much finesse whenever tones are swapped, with but a matter of moments that separate the sisters trying to process the loss of everyone they've ever known and loved from a Cyndi Lauper-tinged shopping montage. Still, I can understand how Night of the Comet could grow on folks with its innocence and laid-back demeanor. It's a low-key production that looks pretty good (the desolate streets and red skies add a freaky touch), while Stewart and Maroney come across as likable leading ladies who take care not to push their slightly-spacey characters into the realm of parody.

I found just as much room for improvement on my return visit to Night of the Comet as I did upon my first viewing a few years back. Save for the occasional good joke and jump scare, it just doesn't do much for me, although I get what's made it a beloved staple in the moviegoing diets of many '80s kids. In any case, Scream Factory's Night of the Comet Blu-ray was made for the fans, who'll be pleased to enjoy Reggie and Sam's zombie-blasting adventures in high-def and with all the bonus goodies they could ask for.

SPECIAL FEATURES:

-Feature commentary with Stewart and Maroney (moderated by host Edwin Samuelson).

-Feature commentary with writer/director Thom Eberhardt (moderated by host Michael Felsher).

-Feature commentary with production designer John Muto (moderated by Felsher).

-Interviews with Stewart, Maroney, Beltran, and make-up designer David B. Miller.

-Photo galleries.

-A theatrical trailer.

-A DVD copy of the feature film.

 (Released by Shout! Factory and rated "R" by MPAA.)


                                                                                                                                                                               
 
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